I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
