omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
