I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
