I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize