If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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