Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize