i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Randomize
