like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
