If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
two words...techno handjob
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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