I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
