"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
