In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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