i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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