You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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