I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
