I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Oh god it's open bar.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
