no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize