Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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