you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
