Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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