I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Everything about him screamed your future.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
