My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
