time to smoke my breakfast
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
