you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Two words: nipple clamps
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