You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
