He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize