If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
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