plz talk dirty to me
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
