so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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