Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
