Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
