why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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