Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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