i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Randomize
