Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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