Nicole vs. Life
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
