But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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