is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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