I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
