I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
