Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
