all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
