Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
