Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
