You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize
