whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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