It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
