You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Randomize
