just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Help me help you realize you are a moron
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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