I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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