I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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